Me, Myself and Lavanya

She is trying all cheap means to get to know about me. What am I doing, where I am etc… She hasn’t felt the pain yet. The pain I am going through each and every day since she got married. Now, she has a husband who gave her all that she wanted from her life. Lots of money, a house and may be everything she ever needed. May be she’s got all the love she ever wanted from her husband. But I truly feel myself lucky, as I am the first person whom she called her “husband”. It meant a lot to me, when she told it. I wanted her and want her now also at any cost. May be I dont have as much money as her husband and don’t have my own house in Bangalore. But, I am sure no one in the world can love her more than I do. I love her the same way I used to in the past. The only difference is that, when I miss her a lot I can’t control my feelings. I cry a lot, try to divert my mind, do something creative, but I simply am not able to! I just need my baby to be happy. I still don’t understand why she left me after being so close to me. She might say everyone she knows that I forced her to love me! But a person who knows what LOVE is.. will never say love comes by force. I have written these many times before in this blog, but can’t help it, can’t stop thinking about her.

I still don’t understand why she deleted all the emails I had sent her. May be she doesn’t want her past to be disclosed to anyone. Now, this is what shows what her love was! May be I am wrong, may be she thought I can’t keep her happy. But, the only reason she has spolied my life is to, keep her parents happy. She wanted all the luxuries or a modern society. Love was always a second priority for her. I have proofs to justify each and every sentence I have written in this blog. I am not writing all this just for the sake of writing something bad or good. In the same blog, I have written a lot of nice things about my love, my baby, my sweetheart. After she came to know that I know a lot about her husband and what she was doing online, she changed her email passwords, and started sending me mails, as if she is missing me a lot!! Fucking bitch. One day she will come to know, money is not everything in life. She can’t go on flirting all through her life. One day, when her children come to know about her, I hope atleast they understand what T.Lavanya really is!!

I started this blog a year back, when she told me that I forced her to love me. This will continue till I am dead. I swear, I will never marry anyone else except her. Everyone who knows me well, knows how stubborn I am. I want the bitch to realize what she has done to me, to keep her parents happy.

Enjoy with the money from your husband and keep fooling him.

The way she has broken me in every way, the ways she has scolded me before getting married, she will learn lesson one day, in this life. She keeps on saying everyone she knows, that she knows what love is! I have said this before and I will say this till I die. No one can ever love her more than me. She may run and hide in any corner of the world, but she can’t escape my love. I loved her and I will love her all my life. She gained a lot by leaving me. She got a husband with lots of money, a house for herself and her parents and brother in Bangalore. Now, she’s just enjoying her life.

From Palamaner to Bangalore..from Bangalore to Johanesburg… and now to Atlanta!!! Long way to go dear.

This blog is my life and if anything unnatural ever happens to me only she will be responsible. T. Lavanya (Lavanya Mahesh)!!! Whatever she may pretend whatever she wants to tell the whole world, I know what she really is. She has runied my me. I dont have anything in my life now.  I am dead…

Every other night I get so many dreams about her, the nice days spent with her. She might be thinking I will forget her as time passes by and marry someone the way she did. She thinks she knows what pain is. She can’t tolerate even a bit of the pain I am going through every day after she got married. I never used to trust anyone easily. But, after this bitch ditched me, I can’t ever trust any other girl in my life. This is for the bitch : She might sleep with how many ever guys she wants, however, I can’t. She was the first girl I slept with and truly loved and will be the last.

She has completely ruined me and my life. I am not able to sleep properly without taking sleeping pills or drinking. Before leaving me the bitch said goodbye to my face! I still have all of her shit messages with me. All bloody lies. The bitch is the greatest liar I have ever seen in this world. I loved her so much, still the bitch was never satisfied. She wanted a husband with more money, a house and all the comforts of a modern world. I rarely used to ask that bitch to spend a single rupee on me, helped her whenever she needed any money, still she used to tell me, love is not everything in life! What the fuck? 

She left me alone to suffer. Only she can make me happy, make me smile. She could have stayed with me if she truly wanted. I want her back, I want to stay with my baby. I am missing her a lot. No matter what she has done to me, still I want her back. I will always wait for her. She always thought of her parents happiness and gave me a lower priority whenever it came to marriage. Spoke shit about love most of the time, if not all the time.

It makes me cry a lot, when I think of this bitch sleeping with another guy the same way she used to sleep with me…